...is exactly what I do!
Pregnancy care, postpartum care, community
Being a doula - a non-medical trained companion - comes with certain stereotypes. Anyone who has ever heard anything about doulas tends to think that their work is only related to childbirth. I've also come across some interesting prejudices that doula is somewhat of a peer counselor, who necessarily needs to have four or five children of their own and who reads spiritual poems in incense smoke. Even though these kind of women also exist, in reality doulas can be very diverse. I won't list all the types, but I would like to unpack the type of doulas I represent.
Support during pregnancy
Doulas don't work seperately with a woman - they work with the whole (extended) family. For the woman, a doula can be a neutral member of her support system when emotions are running high. With her doula, she can confront fears and thoughts that she might not be able to express to anyone else. She can share joy, milestones, new discoveries. A doula is someone to contact when in doubt, when there seems to be cause for concern. A doula can help the couple to try out different birthing positions and breathing patterns, teach the partner massage or relaxing techniques for pain relief. Some women also want to prepare a birth plan so that during labor everyone involved has a common understanding of her wishes.
Postnatal support
We live in a very interesting time, where communities have become small and family-oriented, and connections with other generations or relatives are either stretched out, broken or absent. A doula is like a modern village (although it is not a new profession) who can help make life a little easier for the new family. Postpartum support should be planned already during pregnancy, however sometimes when adapting to the life with a new baby, the mother and other family members may run into problems that were unforeseen. Perhaps the older children in the family feel a bit left out and jealous, the husband finds himsels useless and incompetent, and the mother discovers that she barely has time to take one bite of a sandwich, let alone feed her family three times a day.
When the need of familiy members seem to clash, there are two options - finding a compromise or outsourcing , i.e. getting help from the outside. This can be done by hiring a service - e.g. ordering food/meals in advance - or a person - babysitter, cleaner, lactation consultant, doula. You don't have to be able or even want to do everything by yourself, and asking for help is not a weakness, but a strength. Why not ask for help from a rested and neutral person who can help with cooking, dog walking, breastfeeding advice, diaper changes, mental and physical health, massage and much more? For a new mother being left alone with the baby, especially when her partner returns to work, can be scary! A doula can provide a sense of security with her presence and confirm that the mother is perfectly capable of reading and responding to her babies little cues and needs.
So don't feel ashamed if you need help with only one specific area - the support offered by a doula can be very versatile. When the mother's basic needs are met, she can be a better mother and a wife.
FysioDoula
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